Column: Sharing Lives through Friendly Visitor Program
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Column: Sharing Lives through Friendly Visitor Program

Sharing Lives through Friendly Visitor Program

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Brett and Aixa Dengate visit with Lee and Ruth.

Our wonderful journey with the Friendly Visitor Program at Senior Services Alexandria began around two years ago. My wife, Aixa, and I had discussed wanting to make a contribution to our community related to senior citizens and so we decided it was time. As a bit of background, I am Australian, and Aixa (born in Los Angeles) and I had returned to the USA in 2006 after 11 years living DownUnder.

With the assistance of Sarah Drexler, the Friendly Visitor Program director, we were paired up with two people from an assisted living facility in Alexandria. Aixa met Ruth, a former nurse, and I was introduced to David, a former lawyer. I practiced law as an attorney in Australia for several years, so the match with David made perfect sense. We set up our Sunday morning visitation schedule and thoroughly enjoyed our time relaxing and chatting as well as taking Ruth and David for a roll around the neighborhood for fresh air as often as possible. I also had the privilege of reading David the weekly letters his mother sent to him from upstate New York.

Sadly David passed away early this year. I will fondly remember his quirky sense of humor and his penchant for having his hair dyed green for St Patrick’s Day and then as often as possible thereafter.

On Ruth’s suggestion, Sarah reassigned me to a former rock n’ roller (pony-tailed and all) named Lee. As I was also a professional drummer in my past who continues to play locally, it was another good match and Lee (a former drummer and multi-instrumentalist) and I connected immediately over our Sunday morning coffees, delving into the history and personnel of the rock bands of the ‘60s, ‘70s and beyond, a subject of which he has an extraordinary knowledge. I do my best to complete my weekly homework based on the notes he writes up on blue index cards, and listen to the songs and albums on the Internet he directs me to.

Several months ago, due to an unfortunate set of circumstances, all of Lee’s musical and other possessions that were housed in an external storage facility were lost. I put word out on social media and was able to find a lovely green Washburn acoustic guitar for Lee. It was indeed a magic moment to see Lee’s eyes light up when I pulled the instrument out and handed it over to him. Priceless!

I have also recently started visiting another senior in Old Town Alexandria. He is a kind-hearted and fascinating man with extraordinary career achievements to his credit, and our chats each week are a delight. Furthermore, we have had several lovely outings with him and his wonderful wife, and our friendship continues to grow.

It is truly a privilege to spend time with these seniors each week and we are greatly indebted to Senior Services Alexandria for the opportunity to give a little, but receive so much in return. The experience truly enriches our lives.

If you are interested in volunteering to be a Friendly Visitor or if you know a senior who might benefit from having a weekly visitor contact Sarah Drexler at friendlyvisitor@seniorservicesalex.org or call 703-836-4414, ext. 120.